WARNING: “You’re going to hear the P-word and trust me—that word isn’t ‘presidential'”—Full Frontal With Samantha Bee
Some things I taught my daughters—how to tie their shoes, drive a car, do their own laundry, sew on a button, and not mix stripes with plaid. Some things they just figured out on their own (or IDK in the streets or somewhere)—how to tell jokes, draw, write, travel the world, and rock the stripe/plaid mix. Some things they learned from others—foreign languages, social media outlets that are NSF mamas, and how to make a mean risotto out of an almost empty larder.
But some things, some really important things, they teach me every day—the joys of discovery, passion for justice, practice of compassion, and therapeutic value of the group mani/pedi.
And this week, I learned (again) why Donald Trump is unworthy of our votes—not just as women, but as human beings.
Daughter #1, Amanda Taub, writes a column called The Interpreter for the New York Times (along with her writing partner, Max Fisher). In yesterday’s column Special Tax on Women: Trump Tape Is a Reminder of the Cost of Harassment, she wrote:
The leaked footage of Donald J. Trump boasting of sexually harassing and assaulting women is just one particularly notable example of an all-too-common phenomenon: Far too many men treat women’s bodies as if they are fair game for anyone who happens to encounter them.
This kind of behavior isn’t just offensive; it also imposes real costs on women. The burden of avoiding and enduring sexual harassment and assault results, over time, in lost opportunities and less favorable outcomes for girls and women. It is effectively a sort of gender-specific tax that many women have no choice but to pay.
In today’s column, Trump’s Threat to Jail Clinton Also Targets Democracy’s Institutions, Amanda and Max wrote:
When Donald J. Trump told Hillary Clinton at Sunday’s presidential debate that if he were president, “you’d be in jail,” he was threatening more than just his opponent. He was suggesting that he would strip power from the institutions that normally enforce the law, investing it instead in himself.
Political scientists who study troubled democracies abroad say this is a tactic typical of elected leaders who pull down their systems from within: former President Hugo Chávez of Venezuela, President Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe, the fascist leaders of 1930s Europe.
Daughter #2, Melinda Taub, is on the writing team for Full Frontal with Samantha Bee, the take-no-prisoners late night comedy show on TBS which Monday night took on the “extremely lewd” leaked 2005 Access Hollywood tape, the Republican response, and the debates. You could practically see Samantha Bee’s glee as she announced, “Oh yeah. I’m going in on this like a bitch.” True to her word, she takes on:
- Trump’s claim that his 2005 Access Hollywood hot mike statements were “Locker-room” speech— “You weren’t in a locker room, you sleazy pair of sweat socks. You were at work.”
- Vagina Monologue— Check out Samantha’s thesaurus of euphemisms for “the P-word” that mainstream media speakers were unable to say. Trust me—it’s epic.
- The Republican response (Because they have wives/daughters/sisters/mothers/female relatives, Republican leaders’ moral outrage is somehow purer or more er…moral)—”Trump’s comments are not wrong because you have female relatives. Guess what? A surprising number of Americans [100%, proclaims a counter in the background] have at least one female relative. Trump’s comments were wrong because women are human.”
- Debatable Donald: In addition to threatening to have his opponent jailed, spouting a record number of lies that could turn Pinocchio’s nose into a new bridge across the Hudson, whining that the moderators were being mean to him, and looming menacingly around the stage, The Donald asked, “How stupid is our country?”
Hopefully, not THAT stupid.
At least, according to a variety of polls, all of which show Trump’s likely voter numbers falling down into percentages in the thirties. But less than a week after the 2005 Access Hollywood tape was released, outrage is already fading and poll numbers solidifying along party lines.
With only 27 days to go until national elections in a country divided along bitter party and now gender lines, it seems clear that my generation (which arguably includes both Presidential candidates) has not come up with the answers. The tax on women imposed by behavior like Trump’s, the already-fading outrage over his boasts about his right to assault women, our society’s persistent pattern of behavior that forces women to consider costs instead of opportunites, and the anger and frustration on all sides—
“These taxes are the broader cost of the kind of behavior Mr. Trump boasted about in the leaked footage. Sometimes that cost is the pain and humiliation felt by the women who men directly grope, kiss and harass. But it’s also the aggregate losses of all the women who stayed home, who stepped back, who didn’t take an opportunity because that would have meant risking pain or humiliation that, at the time, just didn’t seem quite worth it.”—Special Tax on Women: Trump Tape Is a Reminder of the Cost of Harassment
I’ve said it before to my daughters and nieces: I’m sorry we failed you. I think that I—and most of my generation—need to turn to our daughters and our sons for a way forward. My first granddaughter is about to have her first birthday. There’s still time to make things better for her.
Because let’s face it: a societal tax that targets women, and a president who channels the authoritarian values of some of the most repressive regimes in modern history isn’t what we want for ourselves, and especially not for our children. My daughters taught me that. It’s not a lesson I want my granddaughters to have to learn.
carol hedges (@carolJhedges) said:
Thank you and your daughters for echoing my thoughts exactly. I was a 60’s ‘teen’ feminist, believing that women were not just decorative home bodies, and that we had to fight to make men understand this. We seem to have gone full circle, but with far nastier attitudes. Porn has created a culture where only men are ‘allowed’ pleasure. The media focuses once more on women’s appearances as a criteria of acceptability, and to get anywhere, they have to display masculine tactics as anything ‘female’ is scorned. I am currently in mourning for this country, which has turned into a macho xenophobic place, and for my gender, who will be subjected to the same crap that I fought against. Unless ….strong women like your girls, and strong older women like you and me stand up and say ENOUGH! NO!! xxx
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barbtaub said:
Thanks so much Carol! (I wonder if we could get some ENOUGH! NO!!! teeshirts printed up?)
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alisonewilliams said:
I’ll have one if you do! Feel exactly like Carol about the world at the moment. Glad both my son and daughter (and my husband) are feminists and proud to be so. It does feel though as if we are going backwards.
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barbtaub said:
I knew some women who were a bit older than me—burned their bras while their guys burned their draft cards. They all complained that “my generation” was backsliding on everything they’d worked for, and didn’t appreciate what they had won for us. I’ll bet if we met suffragettes today, they would bitch slap us silly for not being further evolved than we are. (We’d probably deserve it.)
But I truly am impressed by so many young women that I meet today who are thoughtful, well-informed, and strong. They give me hope!
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TanGental said:
I cannot really grasp that this election isn’t some very poor taste comedy but the real thing. Let us just hope the voters do do the right thing
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barbtaub said:
It’s funny…that’s what most Americans said about Brexit!
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TanGental said:
Yes I can relate. Another ridiculously haired narcissus grabbing at the nations jewels
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barbtaub said:
I saw what you did there. That is a beautiful line that covers so much!
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Andrew Joyce said:
WOW!!! (Again) Daughters that write for The Gray Lady and Sam Bee. Two of my favourite (I put the “u” in favorite for all you limeys out there) institutions. But seeing the kind of writer their mother is, one could expect no less.
And speaking of our generation, we stopped the Viet Nam War, but then we lost our way. We ended up giving the world, George W., Chaney, and Trump. I look to the current generation that so enthusiastically backed Bernie Sanders. There might be hope for the world after all.
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barbtaub said:
Thanks for those kind words. Obviously, I agree that my daughters are pretty special!
But actually, I don’t think the world is ending. There are fabulous things still to come, and incredible people making them happen. I wouldn’t go back in time for anything, and I love that my lifetime has seen cellphones and microwaves and computers and the internet and cures for diseases and fewer people starving and more getting an education than at any time in history. Sure, I could do without certain orange politician wannabes, and I get that there are hugely divisive issues that led to his presence. It might even be a good thing if it means that we have to address some of those issues. But overall, I don’t think we’re facing the end of civilisation as we know it, or that we’re about to have fascists goose-stepping down the Mall in DC. (Just to be on the safe side, though, I’ll be staying in Scotland for now…)
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Andrew Joyce said:
“Just to be on the safe side, though, I’ll be staying in Scotland for now…” COWARD!!!! But just to be on the safe side myself, may Danny and I come for a visit when the house is done. You see, we’re cowards too.
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barbtaub said:
Absolutely! Just let me get the loos done first.
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renxkyoko said:
The country is truly divided.
I think trump is already running amok, and doesn’t care anymore what Americans think of him, as long as he maintains the support of his base. Except for a few, Republicans are sticking it out, by hook or by crook, pardon the cliché.
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barbtaub said:
Some people think you get the government you deserve. I don’t agree. Even though this is the most bitter campaign I’ve seen since the 10th grade class president race at my all-girls school, I am encouraged by the number of people who are getting involved. (Although, I do kind of wish that Sister Mary Principal would send a few of them to work-detention and make them wash down the cafeteria tables. That worked at my high school…)
I do think that Trump has tapped into a very real, very deep vein of resentment, that no matter what happens, that will need to be addressed. (Of course, I hope that it’s Hillary doing the addressing!)
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Barb Caffrey said:
My mother and I watch “Full Frontal” every week. I’ll tell her about your daughter being one of the writers there, Barb…and I read the NY Times often, and have almost certainly read your daughter’s column as well. (It’s all in the family there, as you’re all writers. I think that’s wonderful.)
Yes, I agree with you wholeheartedly. Donald Trump is an abomination. He is horrible in every possible respect and he must not be our next POTUS.
(Note: I have been for Hillary Clinton since 2008. I’m still with her. I believe she’ll be an excellent POTUS. But I’d vote for a wet paper bag over Donald Trump any day of the week, as a wet paper bag is unlikely to denigrate women, minorities, the disabled, or anyone else.)
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barbtaub said:
What she said!!!! (And thanks.)
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Barb Caffrey said:
You’re welcome. 🙂
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Bun Karyudo said:
I think what he said was disgraceful, but not at all surprising since he’s already shown himself to be a vile person. I think he’ll carry a majority of GOP voters with him to the end, though. I don’t think they care about policies. They vote purely from tribal instinct. If any idea or individual can be associated in any way with the Democrats, then they automatically despite everything about it.
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barbtaub said:
Actually, I don’t think it’s the old Republican rank and file that will carry Trump forward. They are pretty much getting sick of holding their noses and moving ahead with Trump’s candidacy. But what he’s really done is tap into a deep, bitter vein of anger and resentment among people we haven’t really heard from before, many of them former Democrats. They are angry that the technological revolution with it’s high paying jobs and tech-millionaires has passed them by, and they are desperate to be told that there is someone they can blame for that. Because if they just “beat” that someone, then everything will change in their favor. It’s scary to think about what will happen if they lose, and even scarier to think what will happen if they win.
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Bun Karyudo said:
That’s true. There’s a lot of resentment, much of it understandable, but although the problems may be real, I don’t see Donald Trump being any part of the solution.
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Kate McClelland said:
Reblogged this on Kate McClelland.
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barbtaub said:
Thanks so much for the reblog Kate. I really appreciate it.
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Kate McClelland said:
:0)
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Skilbey said:
The people who are only just now turning away from Trump should be ashamed of themselves; didn’t bat an eyelid until it got personal to them. They have collectively helped to damage and destroy a lot of peoples lives out there. Invisible blood on their hands.They’ll never make the connection. Thanks for your post.
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barbtaub said:
While I agree with your opinion of Republican “leadership”, I’m more concerned about Trump’s grass-roots supporters. He’s tapped into a deeply bitter vein of resentment and anger, and regardless of the election results, that will need to be faced.
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Skilbey said:
You’re absolutely right.I am taking my eye off the ball there, but i feel so cross…
Yes, this is everybody’s worst nightmare and Rep grass-roots supporters can’t be ignored, can’t be tolerated. I fear civil wars. I’m praying I’m wrong.
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barbtaub said:
I think this election has brought out the religious feelings in a LOT of people! I hope your prayers are heard.
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suzie81speaks said:
I was gobsmacked when he was elected, particularly after all of the disgusting comments he has made and the revelations in the weeks prior to the election… I hope I’m wrong…
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barbtaub said:
Thank you Suzie. We’re pretty scared, but of course we all hope for the best too.
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