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How to watch fireworks in America:

  1. Put on your swimsuit and/or shorts and head for the nearest beach.
  2. Scoop out a nice chair shape from the sand.
  3. Keep cool with plenty of icecream, watermelon, popsicles.
  4. Say “Ooooooh!” for the best fireworks.
  5. Realize that this celebration connects you to your past and your fellow Americans.
  6. Assure each other that this year was the best ever.

 

How to Watch Fireworks in Scotland

  1. Schedule for dead of winter.
  2. Show no surprise when it’s postponed due to rain/storm/high winds. That just means you’ll get rainbows.
  3. Put on your warmest coat, hat, gloves, and wellies.
  4. Using your torch(flashlight) because it’s already been dark for hours, head down to village park just as they’re lighting the bonfire.
  5. Keep warm with plenty of hot soup and tea.
  6. Say “Ooooooh!” for the best fireworks.
  7. Realize that this celebration connects your companions to their past and to their fellow British—including, perhaps, those misguided colonials across the Atlantic who think fireworks are for the summer and so miss out on the whole bonfire and all that great hot soup…
  8. Assure each other that this year was the best ever.

 

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