Tags
America, celebration, ex-pat, fireworks, Fourth of July, Guy Fawkes, humor, Scotland, United Kingdom
How to watch fireworks in America:
- Put on your swimsuit and/or shorts and head for the nearest beach.
- Scoop out a nice chair shape from the sand.
- Keep cool with plenty of icecream, watermelon, popsicles.
- Say “Ooooooh!” for the best fireworks.
- Realize that this celebration connects you to your past and your fellow Americans.
- Assure each other that this year was the best ever.
How to Watch Fireworks in Scotland
- Schedule for dead of winter.
- Show no surprise when it’s postponed due to rain/storm/high winds. That just means you’ll get rainbows.
- Put on your warmest coat, hat, gloves, and wellies.
- Using your torch(flashlight) because it’s already been dark for hours, head down to village park just as they’re lighting the bonfire.
- Keep warm with plenty of hot soup and tea.
- Say “Ooooooh!” for the best fireworks.
- Realize that this celebration connects your companions to their past and to their fellow British—including, perhaps, those misguided colonials across the Atlantic who think fireworks are for the summer and so miss out on the whole bonfire and all that great hot soup…
- Assure each other that this year was the best ever.
Barb Taub 
And, of course, carry out that most British of traits: celebrate failure – either the conspirators’ failure to execute their plan, or the failure by the government of King James I to deal equitably and properly with the oppressed Catholic minority.
Nah. We’re not doing that – we’re having a party.
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PAR-TY! (Cause what could be more fun than celebrating the death of a scapegoat who escaped being hung, drawn, and quartered for a failed assassination attempt when he jumped from his scaffold and broke his neck? Good times!
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So funny! In Spain, they don’t need an excuse for fireworks. They are just about every weekend much to our dog’s annoyance. If their football (soccer) team wins, if its a fiesta, if its a religious holiday, if school is out for the summer, spring break, etc. Same rules apply though.
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No wonder there aren’t that many pet dogs in Spain. Their firework-therapy bills would be staggering.
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And in India, choose the monsoon season to celebrate Diwali, wake up at unGodly hour of 4 AM, take an oil bath that sticks to your skin, eat loads of unhealthy goodies, and burst fireworks outside your home. Hate it while it lasts, but wait for it next year.
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Actually, one of the things that amazes me about India is that every where we went, we saw weddings EVERY night. And what’s a wedding without fireworks? The poor dogs must be nervous wrecks.
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When dogs take over the world (in the not too distant future) all fireworks will be banned.
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Peri would be happy to campaign for that one. She spent Guy Fawkes night protecting the far back hallway from anyone who might even consider setting off fireworks back there.
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I love the hot jacket potatoes and the soup!
I missed it this year, so I hope you had extra fun on my behalf!! 😀
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I did! It was all fabulous. And there is just something so primally fabulous about a huge bonfire shooting sparks into the air. So wonderful.
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We celebrated Guy Fawke’s Day here…once. But it was grand – we had a pig-picking! No fireworks, though.
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What is a pig picking? No actually—maybe it’s best if I go on in blissful ignorance.
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It’s a traditional Southern meal for a big gathering – the roasting of a whole pig over a fire. When the meat is done, the guests “pick” the meat off the bone. We once did this for a beach party in California – the entire pig was devoured in a matter of minutes.
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Wow. I was going to make a comparison to medieval feast excesses. And then I remembered. I once set a gigantic roast turkey in front of my daughter’s sleepover guests—a group of tiny little teenage girls. It was like one of those nature movies of the wildebeest stumbling into piranha infested waters. There’s kind of a boiling frenzy and a moment later all that’s left is a gleaming skeleton. The Hub and I had to order out for pizza—which we ate locked in our room for safety.
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