They say vengeance isn’t good for us. We’re told it’s soul-destroying, it belongs to whatever deity you subscribe to, or that before you head out, you need to dig two graves.

We know better.

The reality is that revenge feels good on a chemical level. In the past decade, studies have shown that planning revenge stimulates the dorsal striatum, the reward-related section of the brain. However, further studies seem to show that actually achieving the revenge might reduce that pleasure. The greatest pleasure, therefore, is in the planning.

Of course, when it comes to revenge, I’m a rank amateur. Sure, I know the basics. You identify the waste of oxygen who done you wrong, and then work your way down a time-honored vengeance menu.

Revenge Menu à la carte

• Appetiser—Sharing Platter: In case the cheaters don’t know yet that you’re onto them, it’s always fun to share the news with their family, friends, employers, and any random passersby who can spot the giant sheet detailing their crimes draped across the front of your house. Or a full-sized billboard on your main street. (It’s the little things…)
• Main Course—Car Tartare: Key-scratch your name across their car (bonus points for visibility and penmanship), superglue the gas cap on, maybe slash a tire or four. Breaking windows is noisy, but if you happen to have access to the keys, it’s always charming to stuff some fresh tuna down small slits in the seat upholstery. And of course, there’s the can of spray paint that can be used (with a little practice) to write large words across the car documenting your ex’s offenses. Extra credit if you take a picture of the results and post it on a neighborhood billboard.
• Dessert—Legs Crossed: revenge can be disturbing and frequently icky. In 1993, Lorena Bobbitt famously hacked off her abusive husband’s penis and then tossed it into a field. In 2004, a crowd of victims in India stormed the courtroom where Akku Yadav was about to be released after allegedly raping more than 200 women. The enraged mob cut off his penis before beating him to death.
  
  

  In the 1970s, Thailand reported an epidemic of abused wives severing their husbands’ penis, and then throwing it out the window. Traditional Thai houses were built on pilings above ground for ventilation, while the family pigs, chickens, and ducks lived beneath. The epidemic of penile amputations gave rise to a popular saying, “I better get home or the ducks will have something to eat.” [image credit: The Guardian]

Revenge: a dish best served cold?

If the anticipation of revenge is the most pleasurable part, then a long cold preparation should be exquisite. For example:

• Just kidding. in 75 BCE, 25-year-old Julius Caesar was captured by a band of Cilician pirates in the Mediterranean. He befriended his captors and even convinced them to ask for a higher ransom, all while he joked that he would have them all crucified. After he was freed, some time passed. Eventually, Caesar hired a small private army, returned to the pirates’ base, and indeed had all of them crucified.
• You Killed My Father. Prepare to Die. Blaming the Ming Dynasty Emperor of China for the deaths of his father and grandfather, Manchu Chieftan Nurhaci proclaimed Seven Grievances against the Ming Emperor and called for rebellion. It would be 43 years before his successor finally conquered China, by which time the Emperor had committed suicide.
• High School Can Kill You. Carl Ericsson was the victim of a high school prank. In 2012, more than 50 years later, now 70-year-old Carl showed up at the house of Norman Johnson, of one of his bullies, and shot him when he opened the door. By that time, even Ericsson himself was shaky on the details, but he still received a life sentence for the plan.

One of my favorite writers ever, Terry Tyler, has been crafting revenge-themed novellas for her latest series. Served Cold, the first book of her Revenge series, is Terry at her deliciously wicked best.

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Served Cold:  BOOK #1 of the REVENGE SERIES by Terry Tyler

Revenge is a dish best served cold

Two novellas in which vengeance is planned long after emotions have cooled … these are calculated, deliberate acts of retribution. Justice designed for catastrophic effect.

The Steal

Jodie Tarrant has it all – her own small business, a husband she adores, lots of friends, a house she loves in a cosy English village.
She can see her and Kirk’s future all mapped out, with the children she longs for – until the arrival of an enigmatic stranger becomes a threat to everything Jodie holds dear.

Lucky Star

Abduction! Imagine waking up in a strange room, in a strange building, with no recollection of how you got there.
This is what happens to Stevie Warren. Worst of all, she soon discovers that she can’t leave. But who put her there, and why? Deep down, she has her suspicions…

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My Review: 5 stars out of 5

Because I couldn’t find a job in my preferred field (it was decades before Covid, and surprisingly few employers were looking to pay large sums to people to stay home and read books and bake cookies), I had to turn to the dark side and a career in human resources. More times than I can count, I had to meet with employees to explain that the warning/discipline/firing I was administering was the result of their thoughtlessly cruel quips, remarks, and actions. Without exception, they claimed to be (and occasionally were) astonished. “Can’t they take a joke?”

I realized that the victim always took the situation far more seriously than the perpetrator, who probably never thought of it again. Inside each of us lives a five-year-old child saying, “It’s not fair.” And sometimes, that child decides to get even.

In Book 1 of her Revenge series, author Terry Tyler examines that tipping point in two novellas. Although very different, they share a fundamental element. Each involves a thoughtless action by a young person who wasn’t acting out of hatred or even any particular malice. But for their victims, the effects were literally life shattering. While the perpetrators carried on with life as usual, the victims faced years of devastation, or even lives ruined.

The victims come to realize that a long, slow, deliciously plotted revenge designed to make their tormentors suffer as they did was the only important thing in their world, the only way for things to be “fair” again. Of the two stories included, I preferred the first one, The Steal, in which the victim did, eventually, balance those internal scales. The second story, Lucky Star, is a horror story with a dramatically grim premise and a suitably horrific twist.

In each story, the plot, pace, and setting are perfectly crafted. But in each it’s the description of the main characters’ development that take them all the way to brilliant. Author Terry Tyler’s ability to masterfully craft three-dimensional characters is what keeps me coming back, no matter the genre that she chooses.

And if you like character-driven, twisty, meticulously plotted tales, you’re in luck because book 2 of the Revenge series, So Shall Ye Reap is now also available.

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