I can only think of two reasons for me to make a sacrifice. Reason #1: the chance to win obscenely big prizes (Yes, Monty, I’ll sacrifice the washer/dryer and year’s supply of dog shampoo I’ve already won for what’s behind door number three). Reason #2: someone who shares my bed or my DNA needs me. (Yes, I’ll gnaw off my own hand to help my child on the offchance that s/he will serve up some grandchildren someday.)
My fellow women, many brave margaritas were sacrificed to bring you the cautionary warnings in the following list. If you get married, chances are good your spouse will be a male______ [fill in blank from list below. Bonus points if you get all ten.]
I promised you the BIG REVEAL… And here it is!
Calls for Men to Be Blindfolded in Public
In response to claims that men are unable to restrain themselves from committing rape if they see women in skimpy clothing, members of law enforcement agencies around the country have called for men to blindfold themselves when they are in places where they might encounter a female wearing a tank top or a short skirt.
To the conservative christian movement: This is why the bible doesn’t mention evolution.
by Nathan Caleb Taub
God: MOSES! HEAR ME!
Moses: I hear you, oh Lord! Actually, I can really hear you. Can we tone it down?
God: Oh, sorry. Is this better?
All the dumb, loud, germy, messy stuff kids do that drives moms into Betty Draper-like neurosis was my mother’s creative inspiration, like the time in 1988 when she awoke at 3 AM to find me, then four years old, prying her eyelids apart with my fingers.
He’s an ungodly soccer-playing card sharp on a mission from God. She’s a beautiful punk fairy princess with with her own daytime radio talk show. They fight crime!
I think this article should be required reading for all mothers (and daughters!) Please do yourself a favor and see …
by Fia Coldwell
Killer Fiction
Looking for answers to life's questions
words, glorious words...
Making memories one day at a time
dreamer of dreams, teller of tales
Drift among the scribbles of writer Janet Gogerty
Sometimes, life is like that.
Writing Magic, Myth and Mystery
The Blog about everything and nothing and it's all done in the best possible taste!
not a real newspaper
Thirty Years of Wonder
Here, There and Everywhere
Curiosity run amok . . .
Rants, Ramblings, and Regrets
Writing, life on a sailboat & other oddities
Building Books - One Step at a Time
...where the ladies are headstrong and the man is outnumbered.
Echoes of Life, Love and Laughter
The opinions expressed are those of the author. You go get your own opinions.
Climbing, Outdoors, Life!
The humor and humanity of storytelling.
Shorts, Novels, and Other Things
Cat adventures and other tall tales.
Ideas on writing and baking
Bizarre thoughts from author Jenny Lawson - Like Mother Teresa, only better.
Writer
"...it's like the ticking crocodile isn't it? Time is chasing after all of us." J.M.Barrie, Peter Pan
