When I looked at my blog stats last week (for the first time since last January), a couple of things stood out. First, of course, is that recreational substance abuse—perhaps combined with advanced illiteracy—is alive and well among my blog visitors. At least, I can’t see any other possible explanation for the continued hits and searches for a combination of “sex”, “taub”, and other truly disturbing search terms, especially given the weekend spikes in same. (How could “unicorn sex c*ck taub” even possibly be a thing, let alone one that leads to my blog?)

But the second thing I noticed was that the most consistently popular blog posts are my completely irrelevant observations about death, kids, pets, life and other random topics. And it turns out that I’ve written a lot of them over the years. So I decided to gather them together for a little Kindle experiment.

But I could use your help. The blog posts (plus some old articles and columns) are written, I have a couple of illustrations that will hopefully sneak in under Kindle’s size limitations, and I’m trying to keep the sale price at rock bottom by self-publishing. That just leaves the covers.

And that’s where you come in. What should a cover for a collection of (hopefully) humorous essays look like? With fingers-crossed, I went to Canva and tried out a few of their standard layouts. I’d love your input and suggestions. Please vote, comment, and/or tell me to go back to the drawing board. [click on any to enlarge]

COVER 1

COVER 2

COVER 3

COVER 4

Oh, and if anyone would like an advance copy for review, please let me know.

Just let me know where to send an eARC and my undying gratitude.