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How to take a good walk in Scotland. Guest post by Barb’s dog Peri.

Dear Barb’s readers:

Supposedly Mark Twain called playing golf “a good walk spoiled”. But that’s just because he never took a walk on a little Scottish island with Barb.

Now, everyone knows there are exactly three reasons to go for a walk.

Reason #1. Find exotic poo from other animals. Eat it.

Reason #2. Find something muddy and disgusting. Roll in it.

Reason #3. Combine #1 and #2.

I’ve been trying to explain this to Barb for years, but she still doesn’t get it. Take last Sunday. She kept blethering on about hills and heather and some nonsense about the view. But I can tell you from personal experience that she didn’t eat any poo, nor did she roll in anything smelly.

I feel sorry for her. Truly I do.